Friday, April 29, 2005


... with the dissertation supervisor!

You will be pleased to know that we finally caught up with each other and she's happy with what I've written. I never thought I would be up to 8,600 words by now. I have a Health Psychology critique and this to finish and then I've only got 3 things left. Two exams and an essay and my degree is complete!

Sounds like a lot of work, argh! Its ok though, because God is in control and I don't mind working the whole of Saturday so I can have Monday's bank holiday chilling with my house mates. We may even stretch ourselves to a BBQ... if it doesn't rain.

I feel like I have more to say, but I don't know what it is. I guess I'm a mixture of happiness and nerves right now. That is a place I do like being. I love the idea that I'm nearly at the end of my degree, but that also means that I'm close to finding out where I'll be next year.

I'm excited about the summer. I'm hopefully going to meet lots of people, what ever happens and concrete more friendships. I think it might be because the sun is shining right now and I have a night off from TGI's. There's a big sense of hope and peace in my life (with out sounding really hippie)!

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

You'll be happy to know...

... I've reached 8,000 words for my dissertation, and luckily I'm no where near finished!

That may sound weird, but I have reached this special place of my minimum word limit all by my self... (there's that song again, why does it keep coming up?) She's gone again, the dissertation supervisor that is. I saw her for all of 5 mins on Friday, where she told me that there's been a study in Beford proving girl gangs and violence is all moral panic (only exists in people's heads e.g extreme terrorism). I did actually get excited again.

Great I have my conclusion, or there abouts, and I can't get the article to write about it. Argh! The excitement died. And no emails either.

Why do we keep missing each other? Did she forget her keys again? Am I ever gonna stop talking? Will I survive a night in with Liz and Henry, or will God save me?

All these questions and more maybe answered later, if I have the time!

Monday, April 25, 2005


I know that in 10 mins I have to go home and finish writing the presentation I started writing on Saturday morning. I think I'm nervous about doing it.

It's my 2nd presentation this term and I'm not sure that it'll be any good. I think that I could probably get away with it, but then I realised it is to a whole class of older people. All the other presentations I've ever done are to a smaller seminar.

Maybe that’s why I chose to do it so late in the year. Oh well, it has to be done and I have to get a mark.

Blogger have introduced the 'recover post' feature, and I'm not sure I like it. I haven't had to use it yet, but I have noticed how slow typing has become as the cookie system deals with saving each individual letter. Half my sentences take an extra half a second to appear. I maybe annoyed because my attention span is minimal right now, but it doesn't help if you are teaching yourself to touch type!

Anyway, I'll stop complaining now and tell you how my 'Did Jesus exist?' talk went. All in all it was really good. I have enjoyed working with Charlie and the TGI’s for the last 2 or so years. I realised how much I love getting excited about Jesus. He’s amazing! I hope that they went away thinking about who Jesus is and how they know him; they just need to apply him to their own lives.

I even asked them what they thought of me. I got one negative answer, and they don’t recognise me as a leader with out prompting. I couldn’t work out if that was positive or negative. But the idea was that they know me because I’m there, Jesus was there too. Putting the Bible in to their lives inspires me so much.

I wasn’t really challenged when I was younger, but I do relish challenges. I love God because he wants me to feel uncomfortable. I love God because he will comfort me when it all goes wrong.

It has been a good few days. Just work from university to do now. The next time I write about TGI’s I will no longer have dissertation issues, because I’ll have handed it in!

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Biscuits and Circuses

01 - Sunset
This is the sunset I promised from yesterday. There are more here.

The title comes from the name of the cell I am currently a member of at St Mary's, but it also ties it to where I was last night.

I went to see the Moscow State Circus. It was so much fun to laugh with the girls and see some very talented individuals at work.

Really enjoyed forgetting the fact that I had a lot of work to do. But during the performance my little brother asked me (via text) if I would be at home at all this term. He wants the family to go out for dinner. I can't go back and I'm absolutely gutted. Now comes the time where I have to convince him to come and see me. A trip on the M25 and M1 should be interesting for him!

I will se my dissertation supervisor eventually, it transpires that she forgot her keys yesterday. Bless! I know how it feels to be that stressed, I've forgotten my keys once this week too.

Off to do some work for next Friday's presentation and try to pull some Alpha facts in to Sunday's talk.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

To write or not to write...

I could leave this post blank and let you decide what should be discussed...

Or a could just chat away to you about nothing significant.

I think I may be too much of a talker to decide the first one

I did go and see my dissertation supervisor an houir ago, as planned, but she wasn't there. Thinking about going up now to check I had the right timje. If she's not there I'll email her.

Did Jesus really exist? Comments please. I have to sell Jesus to the 11-14's on Sunday. I'm gonna go and see charlie in a minute and see what he has to say.

So far the extent of the answers have been 'yes - of course' and 'no'. Two ends of the extreme. Could I get something a little more in depth?

I took some pictures of the sunset on Sunday and Monday, I'll post them soon enough!!

Friday, April 15, 2005

God's Love

Don't really have anything to say, as I am sitting in Uni thinking, why has my dissertation supervisor vanished into thin air?

She's gone, not in her office, and not replying to my emails. If i don't let this go I'll start thinking that the world hates me! I'll email her again, maybe she's teaching.

Last night was the first time in 2 years that I turned up to CU late and with nothing to do. It was great to actually learn something about God and who he is. My particular small group looked at final judgement.

We read Romans 1, 2 & 3. It was alot, but it did make me realise how childish I've been acting in the last few days. I've been getting annoyed at people for reasons that are mainly based on the way I feel, not by actually speaking to them. Another thing I need to learn about clearly, especially when God was shouting at me on the way back from Kent.

He was saying about unconditional love and how I need to love people no matter what they've done. If I have issues I need to share them with that person before I get angry, because they may have every right to have been acting in that way. Or maybe that's just something I have to adjust to as part of their personality.

"You see the depths of my heart and You love me the same" - Chris Tomlin

Obviously he's talking about God and his unconditional love for us. I need to learn to share it!

So I did have a lot to say... hope it was helpful.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Wales again

Just a quick one before my 9 am lecture to let you know that I've been offered a job in Wales.

I can go there if I want to. I still have other things to consider, but lots of people keep mentioning the Welsh boy. Believe me, I don't know who he is, but he does sound good.

Of course I am not that fickle and would not choose a place just because of a boy (or perceived boy in this case).

I got excited when I told Selina last night, we jumped around a bit at cell because she has a job for next year too! Very happy, but the lecture is calling. I'm so dedicated!

Monday, April 11, 2005

Back to Uni

I got up really early this morning and experienced the student world waking up around me, very fun. The IT Suite is now getting louder, so it's nearly time to leave and go to Kent for a couple of days.

Yesterday was an interesting day. I had TGI's in the morning, foirst one back after easter and the start of my final term with them. I've very sad to be leaving the lovely people in the team and the young people in the group.

I get one final go at youth work with these guys at Ignite. I'm starting to get excited about that, but I have to finish my degree first!

The evening service was really good for me. I didn't actually grasp what the talk was about, but God wanted to say something different to me. I thought I was dealing with it quite well, then I talked to a couple of people and it turns out I'm still holding on to stuff.

My Dad is teaching on John 21 v 15-25 next Sunday, and it struck me how desperate God is for the Love he gives to come back to Him. He needs to hear confirmation that he is loved by Peter just as much as we do.

3 people told me that Jesus loves me and has something great planned for me yesterday, and I still don't really believe it. I need to let go and trust whats going to happen to me will be good.

That is easier said than done.

Saturday, April 09, 2005


It went really well yesterday.

I had a lot to say, and so did they. The guy who interviewed me put a postive spin on everything that I did and was happy for me to use all my past experience to deal with problems. To say I had a lot on my mind was an understatement...
But the Sun shined on the whole day
Sun in Newport

It was really good to chat to some of the staff that work there, even if I did end up talking about their connections to Luton. Christian circles are very small.

I just have to wait to hear from them now. Should be by the end of this week hopefully!

Wednesday, April 06, 2005


I'm back in a very sunny Luton. It seemed like such a task yesterday to get everything ready, but I have worked out that I can pack just as effectively in no time at all, than taking a few days.

I'm a little bit ill right now due to not being as busy as last week and the live jab that I had on Monday. Please pray for me as I have a report due in 8 days and I'm ver scared I won't get it done.

Went to Selina's last night, having not seen her for 3 weeks. I wasn't impressed with the constant laughing at me over being ill and my attidue! But hey, I'll be able to laugh one day.

I'm glad to be back and can't wait to go to church on Sunday and see everyone.

Monday, April 04, 2005

Harrow and all things GOD

Well, I'm back from Harrow and mission.

Sitting at home hoping that I'm not ill, but the sore throat is telling me differently.

I loved the mission. We did a holiday club and various evening activities. It is great to tell people about GOD and show love through the actions.

I also participated in a small miracle. We ripped up a picture that we had drawn and put it back together. 'GOD can fix everything'. Yes he can, one boy decided to rip his A4 picture into lots of peices, saying 'its impossible to put back together'. But after about 45 mins of sitting in front of the picture, it slowly came together.

The next morning we showed him the picture, I think he was impressed. I definitely was, I forgot GOD had that much patience (and more).

So many people want to start church because their children went to this holiday club.

Very happy and very humbled by Jesus.

I also got to lead one game in the 14-18 event. It was great to hear the young people enjoying themselves. It was good to see the team get so involved with everything. Although we complained about tiredness, the Holy Spirit still worked through everyone.

I had my interview for there as well. It went well, and I would be appy to go there. I think that I have a very tough decision to make in the next few weeks. My brain hurts.